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Conscientious Objecter

Wednesday the Christian author Robert Elmer visited Fort Worth Christian. He taught the students that God gives us experiences so we can tell our stories. He stated what a huge difference it would make if every christian wrote about their story so others could learn what Jesus actually does in our lives. I thought about what he said and felt prompted to share my story. Please feel free to send any complaints to him.
As I see it when something does not make sense, well, you have to object to it, right? I know I regularly walk around with objections in my head.

For example I heard a great sermon last Sunday. I nodded in agreement as the minister spoke of the assurance Christians have and how we should not live under crushing fear because we know God will take care of us even in this economy. Two days later I learned that Brad needs Obama to approve money for the Air Force to have the funding needed for the F-22s they want to buy from Lockheed. Simply stated no money from Obama means Brad and half his department will be unemployed. Right then I become a conscientious objector. I ignored the minister's assurance and let worry creep into my left shoulder blade and neck. I then begin to ask questions to Brad but became even more concerned with every answer. I completely objected to the request to not worry and fret about this situation. I am supposed to just let this go. That doesn't seem very responsible? The scripture "Have no anxiety about anything with prayer and supplication let your request be made known to God" popped into my head. My request? Excuse me, my request was submitted in November and it was not Obama. Lord I am not sure I trust you with my request.

I am a Christian I know God will take care of my needs but....how do I restore my soul? How do I know I won't find God's version of meeting my needs disappointing? In my head I am screaming God why oh why did you give this man a voice in the employment of my husband?! At this point I am no longer making the calm face. I have moved to the focused let's make a plan stage. But the plans I tried to make seemed far fetched and brought little peace. The scripture "Lean not on your own understanding" rang loudly through my ears. Seriously Lord that's your message of hope. Inwardly I rolled my eyes and then distracted myself with tasks for the rest of the evening.

What makes my reaction to this situation so pathetic is merely a week ago God removed a lump from my breast. I mean one morning it was there and I was freaking out buying life insurance and that same afternoon 2 doctors could not find it. Praise the Lord! I was healed. God met my need. Please do not ask me why I believe God can do plastic surgery but can not handle the economy because I have no answer. I can completely relate to the Israelites being so personally led by God and so utterly faithless.

In my quiet time this morning this jumped out at me "So leave your foolish fears, and follow Me, your Guide, and determinedly refuse to consider the problems of tomorrow. My message to you is, trust, and wait. "I will instruct thee and teach thee in the way which thou shalt go: I will guide thee with mine eye." - Psalm 32:8"

Then on the way to school Katie Beth shared what Jesus told her after she said her prayer. He told her that he put a light in her heart to shine forever no matter what. I was taken aback by the NO MATTER WHAT part of his message. I had no story and my light was dim.

As if that wasn't enough to chew on tonight I heard a teaching on John chapter nine about the pharisees objecting to Jesus healing the blind man. Apparently viewing the situation through their personal filter of politics, restrictive religion,fears, and emotions the pharisees became blind to the origin of the marvelous healing. Someone should really ponder that and apply it to their lives. Oh hello mirror.

Given all these messages I have decided a few things.
First, for the time being my mind may only venture 30 minutes ahead. Farther than that and the blindness and worry start to show up.
Second, I am going to become a conscientious objector to my conscientious objections.
Third, I will write more stories to share His light within me.
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